I’ve been writing about thoughtful, provocative, inspiring and challenging topics for a few months now. I may come across as strong and wise on the outside, but there’s an equally vulnerable and ignorant Kim on the inside. It’s not easy to share with the world my vulnerability… I might feel slightly naked for a little bit, but this blog is all about challenge and personal leadership, right?!
I’m just over the halfway mark of my journey abroad and I feel a range of emotions mixing and clashing with one another.
On one hand, I’m thrilled, proud, speechless, grateful, relieved, surprised and immensely happy with the experiences I’ve lived, the people I’ve met and the thoughts and feelings I’ve conquered over the past 10 weeks. My mind is burgeoning with new ideas to make a difference in the world. My heart races as I think of my newfound passions. I feel this strength inside of me. I can see through myself better than I could at the beginning of this journey. It is so positively exciting.
Yet, on the other hand, I’m scared. More scared than I was 10 weeks ago. What if all these hopes and aspirations vanish behind life’s obligations or routine when I return home? What if I can’t quite make a difference as big as my expectations? What if I realise it was only ‘talks’ and I don’t face up to them? What if the clarity I’ve gained fogs up again into a big grey cloud? I’m 31 years old, wouldn’t it be time I got my career sorted (and love life for that matter, if I am to be completely transparent!)? Confused and exposed emotions…
I think self-questioning is important to personal leadership, growth and authenticity. So I live in hope that my anxiety might fuel stronger answers, more powerful discoveries. I’ve always had tremendous faith in life and myself and it has served me to date. So I will keep on believing…
So I pursue my sabbatical adventures creating more dreams for myself along with more anxieties and uncertainties… but therefore, more opportunities to grow. Cheers to life’s addictive nature!
Who wants to get naked now? What are you afraid of?